Supporting parent relationships for professionals

parents sitting listening to a professional supporting them and helping them to talk and resolve conflict

Supporting Parent Relationships programme is the Isle of Wight’s commitment to reducing conflict between parents. Whether they are together or separated. The reduction of conflict is the best outcome for children.

We often find it uncomfortable to ask personal questions about relationships, but there is increased evidence on the importance of the parental relationship to children’s outcomes. Whether the parents are together or separated, parental conflict can affect children’s emotional, behavioural, social and academic development. It is the conflict between parents, rather than the event of parental separation or divorce, that is a key factor in explaining why some children fare better than others when parental relationships breakdown.

Parental conflict places children at risk of

  • poor relationships with staff and peers in school and their community - this leads to lower academic outcomes
  • lower employability leading to financial difficulties and an increased risk of poverty
  • earlier involvement with drug and alcohol misuse
  • negative impact on neurobiological processes affecting emotional development and can lead to conduct disorder, poor attachment and risk-taking behaviours
  • a range of health issues including sleep disorders, digestive problems, abdominal pains, fatigue, headaches and poor growth
  • poor mental health which carries on into adulthood
  • increased risk of poor adult relationships

We want practitioners to feel comfortable talking about family relationships. We need families to become more aware the impact their relationship has on their children. If practitioners are aware, then this will ensure referrals are made to specialist services for support at an earlier stage. This helps to limit the negative impact on children and parents.

What is parental conflict?

Evidence shows that parental conflict puts children’s mental health and long-term future life chances at risk. This is regardless of whether the parents are together or separated, or are biologically related to the child, such as blended or foster families.

Parental conflict can manifest in different ways from

  • a lack of warmth and emotional distance
  • swearing and shouting
  • non-verbal conflict or the ‘silent treatment’
  • lack of respect and emotional control
  • lack of resolution
  • in the most extreme form - domestic abuse

Practitioners need to continue to be vigilant for indicators of domestic abuse. This includes coercive control and controlling behaviour that adversely affects one person in a relationship. This can be an indictor of an abusive relationship.

Courses for practitioners

All practitioners working with families are encouraged to attend the courses we offer. Conflict is in all families and we need to ensure that it is constructively resolved. It is important for children to experience positive relationship modelling and see differences amicably resolved. This will help them to resolve relationship problems throughout their lives.

eLearning modules 

Reducing Parental Conflict 

This course contains three modules that cover:

  1. Module 1 aims to increase awareness, leading to greater identification of opportunities for early intervention. The session will focus on the impact of parental conflict on child development and outcomes.
  2. Module 2 is designed as a skills-based workshop giving opportunities to practise techniques to engage with couples/co-parents in practical situations.
  3. Module 3 is designed to practice the skills needed to support parents to reach positive outcomes from destructive conflict situations. The session explores how to discuss parental conflict with parents and focuses on practising the skills of handling conversations with parents in conflict, using tools and techniques to enable parents to resolve destructive conflict with positive outcomes.

Reducing Parental Conflict - Managers and Supervisors

Managers and supervisors will learn how to

  • support members of staff through the handling of parental conflict situations
  • recognise the importance of maintaining a focus on reducing parental conflict
  • apply the evidence-base, day to day interactions with parents
  • utilise the tools from the toolkit to support frontline practitioners to work with parents in conflict
  • use questions to probe for further details where necessary
  • handle supervisory discussions involving parental conflict cases
  • advise staff members on the appropriate course of action appropriate to the situation

Supporting Parent relationships refresher

If you haven't already completed the Reducing Parental Conflict or Reducing Parental Conflict for Managers and Supervisors we recommend undertaking those first.

This course combines elements of the Reducing Parental Conflict modules as well as exploring how local services can support.

By the end of this course you will have an understanding of

  • the evidence around parental conflict and relationship distress
  • the roles of parents and stressors in a relationship
  • the impact of parental conflict and how to support parents
  • effective communication with parents

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